not-terribly-elegant:

theroguefeminist:

image

We’re we.

Here fuck.

We’re shit.

Queer up.

iseeavoice:

therainbowgorilla:

qalaba:

iseeavoice:

A human getting pissed at their vampire boyfriend so they put in a silver sterling tongue stud and bracelets and earrings and their vampire boyfriend is just standing five feet away like “babe. c’mon.”


Vampire: “The fair is in town, maybe a date will help…”

human spends the whole time in the hall of mirrors

#AREYOUSERIOUS

WE HAVE A NEW WINNER.

ribbu:

there’s a special place in hell reserved just for me

it’s called the throne

deanbennie:

finding a new favorite character like

image

(Source: shinjidub)

londongrimshaw:

[falls in the shower] parkour

methlabrador:

what if one day you were scrolling through your dashboard when you saw a picture that someone took of you doing something weird that you didnt know anybody saw you doing with like 20k notes 

(Source: mattressblowoutsale)

toopaletofunction:

staythatswhatimeanttosay:

One nation, under Canada, above Mexico.

with liberty and justice for some 

lukehemmingssmut:

this really cute customer came in today and i asked him how he was paying and he said ‘hasta la visa baby’ and then he blushed and cleared his throat and was like ‘um.. visa please’ and i kinda wanna marry him

portablemiah:

American History textbooks more like

Chapter 1: Introduction to White People
Chapter 2: White Settlers and The Indian Savages
Chapter 3: Whitey Makes A Country
Chapter 4: The Blacks
Chapter 5: Wars, Wars, Wars
Chapter 6: No More Racism!: Martin Luther King Jr. Gives a Speech
Chapter 7: The Modern Whites

deathpoolquinn:

mortuary-mary:

legalize wheat and wheat by products.

*sheriff’s secret police sirens*

deathpoolquinn:

mortuary-mary:

legalize wheat and wheat by products.

*sheriff’s secret police sirens*

(Source: )